Follow your bliss

An old friend of mine had a favorite phrase – “Follow your bliss.”

I’ve always thought it sounded pretty. Chase your happiness. Seek your ecstasy. It makes sense, right? It’s such an easy philosophy to live life by.

Do what makes you happy.

But I never truly understood what it meant until recently.

(Warning: personal reflection/ totally personal and cheesy life lesson ahead.)

At some point during the last year, I realized how completely unhappy I was. I was doing the polar opposite of everything that made me happy. I fell into the “adult trap,” doing the things I felt I had to do instead of the things I really wanted to do.

I was overworked and underpaid working for a company that didn’t value me. I was in a soul-sucking relationship that zapped my energy and self-worth and made me completely miserable. I lived in a town that I had slowly outgrown. I was steadily losing my self-identity, pouring myself into things – and people – that I didn’t hold an ounce of passion for. I was letting the weight of my misery push me down into my self-inflicted self-loathing. There were few things in my life that made me feel happy, and I was surrounded by more self-generated negativity than the bliss that everyone should actively seek.

It took me months to realize I was unhappy. And what’s worse? It took me even longer to change that.

It sounds so simple, right? But we get into these habits, these routines. And sometimes they become so comforting that we live in content – or misery – without giving a second thought as to what would make us happy. Sometimes we fear what could be worse. We don’t want to take the risk knowing it couldn’t work out. Sometimes, we would rather live in content than make the leap and be satisfied we did so.

One day I realized that there had to be more to live than living my familiar routine. I wasn’t happy – with my job, with my city, with my relationship – so why wasn’t I taking steps to change that?

I realized I had been making so many excuses as to why I couldn’t – not yet, at least – leave Mount Pleasant.

My boyfriend lives here.
My friends are all here.
I’m signed onto an apartment lease.
I can’t drop out of school.
My job is here.

But slowly, those excuses died. I dumped the boyfriend. My friends – one by one – moved out of our sleepy college town and onto bigger and better things. My lease approached its end date. I graduated. And I realized I was ready to move past my job, onto new challenges.

I was out of excuses. And it was time to make that change and get myself out of my misery. It was time to follow my bliss.

I started applying for jobs I wanted. Not jobs that were easy. Not jobs that were convenient. Not jobs that were cushy, well-paid and monotonous.

And I started looking for those jobs in places I wanted to live. Not places that were close. Not places that my then-boyfriend wanted me to live.

I started doing things for me. I started following my bliss.

I quit my job. I dumped my boyfriend. I left my town. I moved to a new city in a new state, took on a new job and started meeting new people and doing new things. I took that risk, and I’m beyond grateful that I did.

Now, I’m genuinely, completely, 100 percent happy. I’m blissful. I’m ecstatic. I’m in a great place, and it’s not because someone else is temporarily providing me my happiness. It’s because I put myself in this position on my own. I stopped making excuses, decided to follow my bliss, and created my own happiness.

Things have changed so much over the last month, and they’ve changed for the better. And I can’t wait to see how they keep changing.